m.o.d.

Time to start ticking off some of these projects. 

Sometimes I get an idea and it just sticks. So anyhoo I was in the hobby shop and I spotted these tiny guns. The chaps who make the little ward dioramas use these kits to tool up their soldiers. (If you're interested that's a spanish chocolate bar in the corner it's important to keep your energy levels up when you're working hard on these projects).

I was looking at the kit and part of me said "I want them." So I bought them. Then I decided to stick little pins to them. 

Then the next step seemed to be to paint them white. 

Then I had a bit of a go at how they might look mounted up. 

Not bad. A little more finessing perhaps. And maybe a title.

And a fancy frame. 

And I'll put it up on the wall and take a smart piccie of it with my hipstermatic. 

Out of focus and a bit crap but they look well smart. Honestly. Continuing my gun theme my next project will be building a replica dessert eagle handgun. But what should I make it out of? Hmmm.  

The King of Road...

Those of you that know me know that I love my Holden Kingswood. She's a beaten up old girl but driving her is an utter pleasure. She's not built for driving around town - this beast is made to escape on adventures. But she's in need of some TLC and the time has come to start tidying her up. 

The last owner installed air shocks in the beast. This meant she kept deflating and dragging on the ground. If the back seat was full on my fat mates this resulted in a shower of sparks and having to stop every half hour to re-inflate the shocks. Not great so out come the shocks and some new beauties go in. While I was there I decided I might as well put some new springs in too. In go-faster red no less. 

Nice. Now the other problem with the car have been the mag tyres... 

They're old classics but sadly the aluminum has become porous over the years. They had a slow leak and would go flat after a few days sitting up. So I’d be stopping to blow up the shocks and the tyres at regular intervals! In fact once of the back left one decided to blow on the Foxton bridge - the bridge is two very narrow lanes on state highway one. No pulling over. I had to keep driving and shred the bloody tyre. The end result wasn't pretty. 

So new mags. These proved pretty difficult to source. There’s not a big market for new mags on a car that’s 38 years old and not many around. But some rum chaps in Ozzie do make them. However I did have to sit around and wait until they had enough orders to press some new ones. They’re simple and not too fussy and they rejoice in the name “spitfires” Brent at Browning Motors was happy to buy the old mags off me so they’ve gone to a good home. It was a rainy day when I put these beauties on but there was sun shining in my heart I can tell you. 

Ooo aren't they sweet? It was a some hard work but I can report that she’s riding like a dream and I’m using a lot less “free air” If you fancy a spin when the sun comes out then give me a shout. We’ll roll down the windows, put on our wrap-arounds and blast some AccaDacca out the speakers. 

Projects-a-go-go

What the hell have I been doing? Well I originally set up this blog to document the many projects I've got going. However the projects are proving to be a lot more complicated than I first thought and I haven't had as much time as I'd hoped.

So this is something of a teaser. Here's an insight into some of the things I'm currently working on. Some of them speak for themselves while others can afford to be a bit more mysterious until I unveil them in the hopefully not-to-distant-future.

Wicked News!

This is a prop that the director made for his new movie.  It's not often you hear about the director making props. Well this is no ordinary movie and neither is the story behind it. 

It's been a while since I posted anything - I've been developing some fun projects for you people - but now I have something really important to write about.

I'd like to say a big, fat congratulations to my fine friends Simon, Bob and Maile. 

A while ago Simon came to me with a mad - but brilliant - idea of setting a TV series in an old folks home. I built on it and created a story about an retired cop who comes out of retirement and goes undercover into the home. 

We took the idea to the networks and predictably they didn't like it. "Nobody wants to see old people". 

So we moved to writing it as a film.  I didn't have the time to commit to the screenplay but I suggested Bob Moore. 

Bob is a very good writer and an even better friend. And he's married to my cousin (nepotism at work folks). I lent a hand as best I could as script consultant. But Bob didn't need much help he wrote a cracking little script that is involving, funny and  bittersweet. 

Then they needed a producer. Someone smart and hungry. A producer they could trust. A producer who could bring it in over the line. So naturally I turned to the girl who broke my heart when I was 23. Welcome to the madhouse Maile. She was a perfect fit. 

The team was in place. First time feature film director. First time feature film writer. First time feature film producer.    

It was all go. They have all worked their guts out and last week they received news they had received funding to make their movie. It's been a lot of hard work. For no money. For a long, long time. For a project that initially didn't receive a great deal of support. 

But Simon, Bob and Maile stuck at it and now they're going to be filming their movie in a few months time. Needless to say a lot of people are wondering how this project came out of nowhere. Well the simple answer is it didn't come out of nowhere - three people have put their hearts and souls into this project for longer than you might expect. A lot of late nights and a lot of hard graft.    

This is what happens when you have a dream and work hard to make it happen. They're an inspiration to me and they should be to you as well. 

The film is called - aptly - REST FOR THE WICKED. These guys haven't got much rest bringing it in and I'm sure that won't stop when they start filming.  

Check out my Junk!

So what have I been doing over the month of July? Simple answer. I've been collecting my junk mail. Usually I just take all the crap that turns up in out mailbox and throw it straight into the recycling bin. However I got seized by an idea.

I decided to see how much junk mail I receive in a month. This is the final result. Flyers. Leaflets. Giveaway papers filled with Ads. Now I'll be honest with you July turned out to be a bit of a lean month for junk mail but it still made a pretty heavy pile. I weighted it on the bathroom scales and it came up 2.5kgs.

So lets do some simple math. 2.5 multiplied by 12 months. That's 30kgs! Now according to WikiAnswers 1.3 million people live here in Auckland. Now I don't have access to how many homes there are but lets say four people to a residence. That's about 325,000 houses. Multiply that by 30kgs. That's around about 9,750 tons of junk mail a year!

Once more for the hard of hearing 9,750 tons!

The same weight as a WWII Royal Navy Cruiser. Now also it takes 17 trees to make one ton of paper. So that's 165,750 trees that die so we can hear that pizzas now have 10% more cheese.

I am not by any stretch of the imagination a tree hugger but I can't stand junk mail. I'll be putting one of those "No Junk Mail" signs on my mail box. But can I - one man - make a difference? Auckland city council if you're listening then please stop this unsolicited madness! Love and hugs. Nick Ward. Now what will I do this month?

Anyone else want to weigh their junk? Go on I dare you.

That Wonderful Sinking Feeling

Das Tub. Here's a fun little story and the fun little story behind the story. A little while ago a myself and a group of my mates where sitting around at a BBQ and we started rifting on a rather silly little idea. Why do aliens travel millions of lightyears to visit our planet? From this simple premise we came up with a series of very funny ideas. Ideas that I took away and wrote into a fun little short film.

Just an exercise in fun really. Anyhoo then I started thinking about how could I get my alien story on screen. It wasn't the usual dark, depressing kiwi short film. No poor Maori children being beaten by their drunk father. Nobody commits suicide. And their was a distinct lack of a quirky loner. So chances of getting it funded and made? Zero.

Then I remembered that my friend James Cunningham was teaching at the Media Design School here in Auckland. It's an excellent course and then end products come out looking pretty dam flash. Added to this James himself would be directing it. James is the director of the outstanding short "Poppy." So cheeky sod that I am I gave him the script. Maybe his class could make it as a project?

The answer was yes. James liked it and his class loved it. Just one small problem. They didn't have enough time or manpower to make it in it's original form. Any chance we could cut it down? As a screenwriter we live in a world where we watch our babies being interfered with on a daily basis, so since I was donating my work for free naturally I wasn't interested in compromising it.

However the doorway was open. They wanted a film and I wanted to write one for them. So I went over to James' house and we sat down over a few beers and came up with a whole new story. Something they could make in the time and would offer a suitable challenge. Das Tub was the short film we created. It was strange, fun and most importantly it was short. Sidebar: too many short films aren't short at all, sorry but fifteen minutes isn't short! I think short films should be ten minutes max.

Right putting my soap box away now.

So the class liked the new script and we were away. We were also lucky enough to attract the acting talents of two of our countries finest actors. The devilishly hansom Craig Hall and the multitalented Gareth Reeves. These guys brought their A game.

The finished result speaks for itself I haven't been this proud of something I've produced for a while so please sit back and enjoy...

DAS TUB.

On The Road Again..

My Dad is ace. When I think of all the projects I want to get finished - and share here on my blog - I don't even come close to the aceness of my Dad. All my life he has been building things to such and expert finish it has made me look at him as a man who always gets things done. On one of my recent movies they needed a 1915 brass radiator Model T so my Dad built them one - in three days! He can build and make just about anything. But since 1979 there is one thing he hasn't been able to finish. A 1933 SS1 Jaguar. This car has fraught my father at every turn. But he has kept at it. He has has found unfindable parts. When no plans or photographs existed of details of this vehicle Dad would discover someone somewhere with the answer. It's been hard on him. A few years ago after spending years shaping the side of this car he discovered the door didn't fit. The Jag is "coach built" which means it is essentially metal panels nailed to a wooden frame. So, as you can imagine, fixing this problem wasn't easy. In fact when it came to building the car much of the frame had actually rotted away. It was as much a carpentry job as it was an exercise in panel beating. Dad and I have always had a friendly bet that he wouldn't finish this car. $100. I'm happy to announce that yesterday I lost that money when my father took me for a ride in this wonderful car. Yes you can shift from fourth to third gear and he had to tied the exhaust on with his jacket when it fell off on a test run but just over thirty years from whoa to go the SS Jaguar is on the road. Number 28 (it left the factory on the afternoon 23rd March 1933) off the production line and believed to be one of the oldest in existence. And my Dad fixed it. Proud? You bet your cotton socks.Well done Brian Ward.