Thursday, June 19, 2014

Where there's Smoke...

So I've been doing some TV ads again recently. I've been out of the game for a while so I was worried that I might be a bit rusty. However the finished ads are just smashing directed by the very clever Taika Waititi the NZ Director behind such great NZ films as Eagle verses Shark, Boy and the recent hilarious Vellington Vampire "documentary" What We Do In The Shadows.

So anyway here are the ads I hope you like them. They're dark, funny and I hope they strike a cord with the audience...

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Typist Wanted


For many years now I've been making a living as a screenwriter. However it's not a profession that gets much respect from the rest of the industry. Here's a recent example. I got an email from a young lady, a camera operator, who wanted to know if I would write a script for her.

It started off innocently enough with an email...

You'll need to click on these emails to expand them but I promise you it will be worth the effort.


I politely declined. My problem has always been that I'm too nice.  So hot on the heels of this email came another...


Frankly, I don't think I've ever had such an insulting email in my life.

So I send her a message explaining everything that was wrong with this email.


I thought this did a good job of educating this young lady on the error of her ways. It seems I was wrong...


This was followed quick smart by another email...


Am I taking crazy pills here? This person still seems to be trying to get me to "format" her script for her.

Can you spot what is missing from these emails? I did...



Yeah I'm a bit of a jerk here but enough was enough. Would it have killed her to say sorry?

It appears not...


Here in the New Zealand film industry this happens all-too often. Writers are never seen as making any kind of worthwhile contribution to the process, we're just a box to tick or a problem to overcome. Which is why our storytelling suffers.

I hope my pain has given you a few chuckles. I was laughing as I read these emails. Laughing though the tears. The bitter, bitter tears.